Wingless

Wingless
For one Katzen. There's a future out there somewhere.

I have loved you for an age
And I will love you in the next
Nothing will ever change this
Though there is no song on the wind
Nor is there any warmth for the cold
Not even a shadow remains
The path you took is long lost
No lights to guide me
This was your choice
Nare to be seen again
You are lost to me

Memories are all that remain
A heavy burden to bear
A part of me forever more
This is not a weakness
Though it will never be strength
It simply is what it is
So I will sing my own song
Let it fill the wind behind my journey
I will shine my own light
And bring warmth where I can
This is the path I chose

To continue is the greatest challenge
So simple and still so insurmountable
Yet I have done so for so long
Without even knowing how I have
Or even how far I have gone
To turn back is tempting
To hold you is intoxocating
But long ago I had to let go
Your love once graced me
But I am without you now
And I will never be any less.

Everyday

Everyday

Get ready.

 
Dawns first light draws an end to slumber
And so we force ourselves from the safety of our beds
Rally ourselves together and prepare for what lies ahead.
The real world is waiting for us with all her glorious shit
But she'll have to wait cause the coffee is good and hot.
With determination in hand its time to venture past the front door
And find our way to where we must be
Put out every fire we find and line up all the ducks
Bring a touch of organization to chaos
Or maybe even create a little bit of beauty where there was none
Onward and upwards we'll drive ourselves
Well fight as long as we must
And welcome the freedom to scurry back home
Strip away the thoughts of work and life
Fill ourselves with a hot meal and attempt to unwind from it all
Eventually we fall exhausted back into our beds
And finally give in to a long awaited sleep

If you don't read it, then it never happened.

So why do I write?
All these scrawlings that if not here, would most certainly be on the walls if not lost to papers in books, never to be seen in the light of day. I'm clearly not in it for money,  I have yet to submit any of this delusional grandeur of mine to even be reviewed.

I have also watched the faces of people as they read what I write, and of what I have to say.

Watching the gears begin to turn as ideas and images are constructed and examined, to having my choice of words torn apart.
That is something I do enjoy.

But even that is not the reason why.
Some of my work I will admit is to garner opinions from terribly specific people. And everything else. Is for my own selfish reasons. I create because o enjoy creating. Bearing my soul unto a project and making it mine. If anyone else enjoys it, please by all means. Knock yourself out.

But this is for me. I cannot communicate myself as elegantly as I desire. I fail to stop and consider the world around me and simply go with the flow of mine hearts desire.
This has not always been within my favor.
Worse still. I am finding with age that I grow more frequently tied between my thoughts and actually voicing them.

But this is freedom here. On this wall I can bring to fruit the thoughts I cannot elsewise create or share.
Sometimes it is a cage of my own design. Others it's just the wind beneath my wings.

The why is simpler than all this textual diarrhea though.

It's simply because it's what I can do.
I don't need to be the best. But I get to be me.

Where else in the world does one get the same kind of freedom?

Freedom

Freedom
Don't look for the trees

A dream, a goal, a state of being.
But what is freedom but a dream?
It cannot be grasped yet will grace your skin.
It cannot be claimed but it can be given.
Everlasting and usually a lie.
Making it yours will cost the freedom of another.
What is it then but a curse?
Lest you are of vile character.
So what then is one to do for freedom.
It can be won from a life of trials.
Hardship, dedication and sacrifice.
But this is more of a prize than the freedom sought.
Freedom is given.
Given freely from the heart,
From one troubled soul to another.
For no reason beyond simply
Because I want to.